Ladies Can Do Stuff Now

Greetings Polka Dotted Cats! Tiff's been on me (seriously, like on me) for a few months to give her another guest post, because let's face it - my posts have bigger brains. It's science. So after turning her down just enough times that she appreciates me even more I've decided to pause my jazz flute sessions long enough to compose something for all you loyal PDC'ers. Read on and let your brain weep in ecstasy at the divine order I've chosen for these words.

Ultimately the first question I asked myself about writing more for her was: what do I have to say to a bunch of women that would be interesting to them? Then I remembered that the times are changing and ladies can do stuff now. So I now sit here in my bright orange robe drinking scotch to write out some random thoughts that will be of interest to you. Because YOU MISS MY MUSK. Scotchy scotch scotch.

Me being sexy.

Anyways, here is my master plan. I've been trying unsuccessfully to convince Tiffany to do one of two things (get your mind out of the gutter, ladies). One - stand-up comedy. Do any of you know this woman in person? Her story delivery, expressions and mannerisms are just plain hilarious. She probably has a fear of speaking in front of large crowds, mostly I would guess because Jmeoww probably has that fear and they share a brain when it comes to most neuroticisms, but we could work past that. Maybe some cheese would help.

Number two - write a book. This one is self explanatory. Her stuff is funny. By and large she uses correct grammar and punctuation. So why not begin to corral it all into a legible manuscript? I've tried bribing her with promises of trips to Pleasure Town and doing her on a rainbow, but she's still just focused on blogging.

All this could have been hers.

Come to think of it, it's probably all your faults... Yeah, yeah, what the hell people? Stop being such an encouraging community and tell her to go write a book! I'm seventy-two percent sure she'd succeed. And seventy-two percent of the time she'd succeed one-hundred percent of the time. You couldn't ask for better odds.

So let's all stop thinking of our own personal daily reading needs. In fact, for one night, let's not be bloggers. Let's be people. Now drink in my formidable scent and get lost in some jazz flute.

(If you like the order of these words, I have many other words in different sequences available to be viewed at Pixelated Trip. So stop by! I'll give you little cookies an hour before we're doing the no-pants dance.)