Friday, August 17, 2012

My missing childhood

Because it's Friday and because I am only halfway through a multitude of jam-packed weekends and because my boyfriend is meeting most of the rest of my family this weekend, I am going to give you guys an opportunity to verbally abuse me. Does that make any sense? Does it matter?

Here is why. I was raised in a cave. Mom, I know you are reading this and I would apologize but this is entirely your fault. How I grew up to be such a well-rounded human being is practically a miracle considering what I missed out on. What the hell am I ranting about?

Here is a list of culturally significant movies that I have not seen (or seen in their entirety), in no particular order:

The Goonies
The Neverending Story
Willow
The Princess Bride
Labyrinth
Dark Crystal
A Christmas Story
Raiders of the Lost Ark (or any Indian Jones movies)
Ghostbusters
Stand by Me
Weird Science
Beetlejuice
Fright Night
Evil Dead 1,2 and Army of Darkness*
Rocky. All of them.
Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure
The Terminator movies
Robocop
The Matrix
Lord of the Rings 
Harry Potter
The Bourne series
Firefly & Serenity*

Okay, okay. The last few there are my fault as I was probably old enough to choose to watch them myself. I suspect I was too scarred from my childhood to not even think about watching them. Thankfully my boyfriend cares enough about me to make up for the severe lack of cinematic culturization I experienced as a child. We have already conquered the original Star Wars trilogy, Alien, and Aliens.

I hope you all will continue to accept me in your lives. I understand how different I am, and I am working through it one day at a time.

*As deemed culturally significant by the boyfriend.

19 comments:

  1. Your list looks a lot like mine! I just got yelled at the other day for not having seen Stand By Me. SORRY. I heard it's sad. I don't want to watch a movie knowing damn well I'm going to cry.

    But Harry Potter? Not on my list. You should have a marathon. So worth it!

    Happy Friday!

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  2. WHAAAAAT? Seriously, is Chino on another planet? Leeann has missed out on the greats too. I suggest Labyrinth, Goonies, and Beetlejuice ASAP! Those movies were my childhood. Please tell me you’ve at least seen Footloose and Dirty Dancing!

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  3. Wow Tiffany. It really is a miracle that you are able function in today's society. Scientists in Canada have proven through extensive studies that modern human interaction, communication, and vocabulary are completely reliant on those films. Most people are socially crippled with this kind of lack of popular film. I'm proud of how you're overcoming this disability, Star Wars is a big step. I'd recommend the Lord of the Rings, and goonies. Phrases like "My precious" and "Hey you guys" are staples in human language. Good luck, we're here to help.

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  4. My husband is always railing on me for not seeing any "classic" movies and "did I live under a rock my whole childhood?" And I say , "no, I played outside. With friends. Made memories, and such." That usually shuts him up.

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  5. While I have seen at least half of these movies, I am in a similar sheltered boat because I grew up in the WOODS with no cable! While everyone was getting into Nickelodeon or whatever I was stuck with only PBS and NBC... I watched both Barney and Saved by the Bell from age 2-8 hahaha. I am glad we ended up all right!

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  6. The GOONIES? Seriously?! It's in my top 5!
    As far as the Neverending story, it's about as good as it sounds. Never ending. Skip it. And I personally don't like the Labyrinth. Sorry Bowie.

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  7. i admit i lived in a box too growing. when we wanted to rent a movie we also had to rent a VCR because we didn't have one. and i pretty much haven't seen any of those movies you listed here minus the princess bride you gotta see it!

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  8. So it is a Chino thing...

    My co-workers CONSTANTLY make fun of me for not seeing classic movies - like most of this list. But now when you try to go back and watch it's just not the same. The "special effects" are lame because we've come so far lol. I tried watching Bettlejuice recently and Top Gun. Couldn't handle either for more than 30 mins.

    That being said, I have Goonies and you have to watch it! Still good! One of my favs! The Labyrinth used to scare the shit out of me (David Bowie still does) and I rented it a few years ago and it was cheesy. You should still watch! And the Neverending Story I and II (Jonathan Brandis was in the 2nd ;) were SO good. I haven't watched in ages but now I want to. Falcore!! You'll get it once you watch!

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  9. You are not alone...I have not seen 90% of these movies...and honestly I don't want too...but one you HAVE to watch is the Goonies...do it now!

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  10. Seriously Tiff I am on your side. Some of these I have seen and wished my eyes hadn't. Some I haven't and I still think I am half ass cool. So for that your halfass cool and it's totally fine! Hugs!

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  11. admittedly there are some pretty major movies i have not seen, but man you better lock yourself in a room and get watching girl! hahah

    -Jessica
    http://www.jumpintopuddles.com

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  12. I am right there with you! I haven't seen most of these either!

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  13. Seriously? You haven't seen The Princess Bride? I was in love with Wesley when I was little. You need to set a date with Netflix! LOL!!!
    www.winetastegirl.com

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  14. All I can say is this.. Never Ending Story scared the shit out of me, it still does.

    Goonies? best movie ever, possibly.

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  15. I sort of chose to live in a box while growing up. If I didn't feel it was going to entertain then I wouldn't watch. I have not seen the following:
    The Goonies
    The Neverending Story
    Willow
    The Princess Bride
    Labyrinth
    Dark Crystal
    A Christmas Story
    Raiders of the Lost Ark (or any Indian Jones movies)
    Stand by Me
    Weird Science
    Fright Night
    Evil Dead 1,2 and Army of Darkness*
    Rocky. All of them. [Don't like Rocky..]
    Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure
    The Terminator movies
    Robocop
    The Matrix
    Harry Potter [I despise HP]
    The Bourne series
    Firefly & Serenity*

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  16. You poor, poor thing. You have lots of catching up to do. Those movies are all my favorites!!

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  17. I feel that way about Oscar winning movies. I really enjoyed crap movies until I met my husband, he's educated me in the ways of cinematic snobbery. We now try to watch all the Oscar potentials each year. This has taken up the time I used to use to go to the gym. Probably not the best hobby exchange. Good luck on your discoveries. I personally LOVE Beetlejuice and if you don't know anyone with a copy, I'll lend you mine. Of course you should probably take with it Lemony Snicket's Series of Unfortunate Events and (if you haven't seen it) Clue.

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We just became best friends.

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